Celebration of a Life Well Lived

On the shores of Beaver Lake

Dear Family, Friends, Facebook Friends and Blog followers,

As you know, Barend Steenhuis recently passed away after a 15 month battle with lung cancer.  During that time his family was at his side and many of you visited our home on Beaver Lake.  We loved all those visits and had hoped to have many more this summer and fall.  You came from far away and farther away because we had travelled the world together making friends.

It started when Barend attended Nijenrode and came to the University of Oregon for an exchange program.  After the school year was completed, he stayed on to earn his MBA and then married Bonnie Sweeny.  Jacqueline was born before they returned to The Netherlands where the family was excited to welcome a new daughter and sister Sara-Lynn a few years later.

During his life Barend lived and worked in Holland, Belgium, Sweden and the east coast of the US before finding his retirement paradise in Oregon.  He also travelled the world for his job and, in fact, the only continent he had not visited was Antarctica.  Along the way, his ready smile, the glint in his eye and the always positive and playful attitude made him many friends.

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Barend Hendrik Steenhuis

Born January 31^st 1947, Groningen, The Netherlands

Died July 17^th 2014, Oregon City Oregon

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The cremation took place on Monday July 21^st without ceremony.  Barend believed that the gatherings on these occasions are for the living and should be a support for those who, of necessity, remain behind.  He wanted a party to celebrate his life as he celebrated every day he lived.

We would like to invite all of his friends, family and colleagues, who might be able to take part, to a celebration of Barend’s life.  His favorite place became his home on Beaver Lake which makes it the perfect location.

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Beaver Lake Estates

Oregon City, Oregon

September 13th 2014

1:00 pm – 4:00pm

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Between 2:00pm and 3:00pm there will be an opportunity to speak for anyone who would like to share a memory of Barend with the gathering.

We realize that the time and expense to travel to this gathering would be prohibitive for many of you.   If you would like to send a text document, email or card with your remembrance, they all will be placed in an album for viewing during the gathering.

Please RSVP by August 30, 2014

 

Bonnie L. Steenhuis-Sweeny, Jacqueline Steenhuis, Sara-Lynn Steenhuis Bickel.

Adam Whiting           Joshua Bickel

Grandchildren:    Naomi, Julia, Alexandra, Emmett and Kellan

 Email:  celebrate.barend@gmail.com

20316 Driftwood Drive

Oregon City, OR  97045-7339

 

 

 

Goodbyes are not forever, it simply means I'll miss you until I see you again

On Wednesday Opa passed away.  In some ways this was very unexpected as we had always been told it would be a gradual decline, not falling off a cliff and yet this was a steep cliff.  On Sunday Opa had a some trouble breathing after walking up the stairs and he headed to the emergency room.  He was given some oxygen and quickly felt better.  The x-rays indicated pneumonia so he was admitted into the hospital.  We thought he would be out by Tuesday. 
On Monday we visited and joked around and Papa was in great spirits. Overnight things changed pretty quickly and he had to be sedated to keep additional breathing equipment on.  From there the decline was quick.  We're sorry for not updating people more through out this process but none of us expected this initially.  Once we realized we were somewhat in shock and focused on getting through the final hours.  His last day was peaceful and surrounded by his family.  We had beers and nuts at 4pm like any other day we visited.  Lots of memories were shared and we played some of his favorite music.  I'm sure some people wondered why Julio Iglesias was playing in the critical care unit. 

Although of course I wished this day was years in the future, there were so many blessings.  It was clear he never wanted to be dependent on others.  All his grand children were sleeping over the night before and in the morning they were all eating pancakes with muisjes (special dutch toppings).  He even taught Kellan how to roll his up to minimize the loss of muisjes.   He felt great and was happy.

Over the last couple of days we've gotten so many great messages about our Dad and what he meant to people.  Of course we always thought he was a great man but I'm proud that he made a difference in so many other people's lives. 

We miss you terribly Opa but I have no doubt you're entertaining crowds in the next world.

We will update the blog with information on the service as well as updates on the family so please stay tuned. 

Lyrical Chemistry

I woke up today at first light to one of these incredible West Coast Summer days. The cold of night still in the air, dew on the grass, steam lazily coming off the perfectly mirrored lake surface. A doe and her two little fawns happily hopping around their mom, the birds singing, woodpeckers doing the rhythm sections, and you have the first scene out of Walt Disney's Bambi movie. You could nearly hear the romantic mandolin music in the background.  Now picture yourself in that scene with freshly brewed coffee, and you have to agree that it can hardly be more perfect than this. After taking this in for at least half an hour I turn on the television news and watch with amazement the politicians making each other's life miserable. Boy, did they get it wrong! The reason for this lyrical and cliched outburst, and I promise I will never do this again, is simply to show how incredibly good life can be even for people who have a little better insight in their time line, or rather the end thereof. Of course all of this would be meaningless if we did not get to share this corner of paradise with friends and family of whom so many have visited us. We indeed consider ourselves fortunate. What may be most important is the humor friends and family bring. We laugh a lot and the morbid humor is getting to an exceptionally good level. Keep it coming!

It was hardly a surprise when the decision to change from immunotherapy drugs to a  more traditional chemotherapy in pill form was confirmed two weeks ago. To process the fact that this also confirmed there will not be a cure or significant extension of life did not take more than two gulps of air, and 3 minutes later we were onto more important subjects, like where to have cocktails. The tumors in the right pelvis have slowed me down and I walk with a limp, but that may end soon. In the last blog I speculated about getting radiation and guess what: we had the MRI, seen the radiologist, got measured for the cast, had 5  treatments, got my diploma and big hugs from all 5 cute technologists. I hope the testosterone on my chest did not rub off on them, else the technologists may now sport mustaches and speak in deep baritone voices.

Bonnie and I enjoyed the continuation of the World Cup with Holland still in the race. What excitement! We watched the unfortunate disintegration of the Brazil team against the Germans, Holland going from trailing Mexico by 1 goal to scoring twice in the last 6 minutes. The games were surprising and we were watching history being made. We were thrilled by how cool and composed the Dutch Team took their PK's against Costa Rica and how that sly fox Van Gaal changed his goalie in the last minute before the end of the game, and had to watch in total agony how Vlaar took a 30 yard run like a Sunday Morning Amateur to shoot right in the hands of the Argentinian goal keeper. This last loss was NOT my fault. I had to do a CT scan right in the middle of this game and as you can see I kept my orange hat on! No Compromises! The hat tested tumor free and is ready for the next world cup in Russia. Sara and her kids watched the game at our house, which was a nice bonus for the grandparents, but our grandkids may not yet have the same appreciation for the game. We are working on that.

A Holland Fan through thick and thin.

We had a busy schedule of visits to oncologists, radiologists, blood draws for lab testing, CT scan and there was barely a day without some kind of medical event. Of the few times I visited medical providers in the Philadelphia area, I cannot remember one visit where the consult actually started on the appointed time. Not so in the Providence Medical Network, because that organization runs like clockwork, and a medical appointment leaves time to do other things on our busy schedule.

Terry and Fernanda at Stonecliff Inn

In between all the medical professionals we had a visit from Terry, our finance manager from Merrill Lynch, who traveled from his home in Florida, diagonally across the United States to Oregon. You can hardly fly further without leaving the contiguous 49 states. We consider Terry a good friend and we have known him for a very long time, and were pleased that he brought his girlfriend along for a 4th of July weekend in Oregon.
Since he is helping us make lots of money, he is also of  course in the column of professional contacts but it is so much nicer to work together in a friendly atmosphere with complete trust. Bonnie, Terry and I had a real old-fashioned (for me at least) meeting with a real agenda, and then all of us managed to do a delicious lunch at the Stone Cliff Inn without talking shop during the meal. Now that is real friendship.

Harry is ready for a nap!

You of course always hope to get some hot tips from your finance advisor, and Terry indeed came through in a big way when he gave us the name of a fish restaurant on the banks of the Columbia river close to the airport. It so happened that yesterday Pat and Harry had a 7 hour lay-over in Portland on their grueling journey from Philadelphia to Alaska.  We picked them up at Portland airport. What a delight and what opportunity to catch up with friends. By the time they came to Portland they were already 12 hours into the journey but the conversations were lively and we dined on freshly caught salmon that must have been alive that morning. Add some Oregon wines and there was ample material to keep Pat and Harry awake.

Back to the plane.